If there’s one thing you can count on your friends to do: they will REGALE you with tales of the ways you misbehaved, the next day. And you will listen in stupefied horror. Some denial, but that will ebb, leaving you with nothing but horror. Some of the absolutely true statements I’ve been slapped with in such hangover-morning situations:

– “You hit on my girlfriend, until I punched you in the mouth. Then you hit on me.”
– “You tried to convince the cabbie to let you drive, until he kicked us both out.”
– “I woke up at 4 am, and you were peeing off the balcony, onto the downstairs neighbors’ patio. Seriously, go look, there’s a big piss-stain all over their porch.”
– “You threw bagels in the hotel pool from the fourth floor.”
– “Well, now we know my husband can kiss a guy, thanks to you.”
– “You puked in the hot tub, then joked that everyone should stay in and pretend they were bathing in soup.”

I am not proud.

Don’t worry, we’re barely tickling the edge of the rabbit hole on this story. Hehehehe.

The song isn’t quite about this, but I find it appropriate. Let’s get some OI up in here.