Ice Storm 3
So when Dallas gets a hardcore ice storm, tree branches take out power lines helter-skelter.
So hey, you like fiction? Do you like sex and violence? Of course you do. We all do.
Just saying, if you like that kind of thing, you might want to order that book there. I spent the last 6 years writing and editing it. And I like it a lot. You probably will too. It’s got guns, romance, violence, sex, time travel, an assassin, and various other fun shit. I’ll take you for a ride. Buy it. Read it. And then tell me what you think.
[edit] WELL THAT WAS A FUN MORNING. We left the side gate to our fenced backyard open for the pool guy a while ago, and forgot to re-lock it. I also forgot to lock my car last night after coming home, closing the back gate, and bringing in groceries.
Some fucking crackhead sneaked into the backyard, popped my trunk, and stole my fucking BOB that I’d forgotten to bring in after Mys. They got away with an ancient laptop (a Dell D430, more of an overpowered netbook, really), two cheap walkie talkies, various survival gear, and a bunch of other trivial shit. What pisses me off is the bag they stole. It was a birthday gift from Mel 2 years ago, and was worth more than all of its contents.
How do I know it was a crackhead? Well, for starters, they didn’t take my checkbook, my jacket, my machete, any of the bin of survival supplies, the transceiver in the glove compartment, or anything that would have, you know, been easy to fence or make money off of. All they took was a laptop that MIGHT go for $100 in a pawnshop (meaning it’s worth maybe $20 to them), and THE FUCKING VOLTAIC ARRAY BACKPACK.
Secondly, they apparently dumped the contents of THEIR backpack into mine, and left their old one behind my car. WITH A CRACK PIPE IN IT.
If you see some crackhead walking around Dallas with one of these on their back, and the top solar cell has a big scratch on it where I accidentally dropped a hatchet on it years ago (testimonial to the product – the scratch was cosmetic, and did not have any effect on the pack’s ability), drop me a line, will ya?
Gah. This isn’t even a high-crime neighborhood. It’s not even a LOW CRIME neighborhood. Fuckin crackheads.
Up here in wisconsin, we usually just go out for beer and booze. In fact, quite normal before a storm for the Liquor stores to be wiped out.
FYI, there are more just 50 fewer bars in Wisconsin then are in Califonia, and California has almost six time the population of Wisconsin
Wisconsin, where 3 out of every 4 corners will be a bar and all have a PBR sign out front.
Vodka is not answer. Vodka is question. DA is answer!
Ice is usually accompanied by cold, why are they still in short sleeves? Put on the greatcoats comrades!
Because they are still in Texas. Even their cold isn’t really THAT cold.
Are warmed by vodka.
Alcohol only warms for a short time and leaves you even more susceptible to cold. So unless you are an alcohol hardened Russian or Finn, there is no way to drink enough vodka to stave off cold, without suffering catastrophic live failure. We, the lesser human being, must rely on fire and warm clothing.
At Frostburn, I find myself making jokes about having to check drunks for hypothermia.
Is the book available in e-book form?
Da, THE PEOPLE we wish to know.
Yes, on Kindle.
Right thar!
Spent Christmas in Oklahoma with Mother-in-Law. Storm of ice predicted. Mother-in-law look to me. Says “here’s shopping list. you from Minnesota, you drive like this.”
Taught Mother-in-law lesson. Totaled her van of mini. Da. Much vodka that night. Da da da.
(Actually, it wasn’t my fault. I was at a stop light, three cars back in the line, and the kid drifted (iced?) the corner, and I was the lucky target. Heh)
You would think that Okies could drive on ice better than they do, but NOOOOOOOO! We get ice storms virtually every year, but the masses navigate each one of them as if it’s the first they’ve ever seen. When it gets nasty out, I hunker down with vodka or whatever I have around and leave the roads to the drifting/spinning kids to wreck into Minnesotans in minivans. 😉 Because sometimes it’s not a question of how well you can handle it, but of how poorly all the other jackasses do in it.
Indeed. I have a lot of winter driving experience and 2 well-maintained cars with good snow tires. Other drivers, though, often terrify me. Whether it’s the FWD minivan doing 10mph that gets stuck at the first decent hill (and I live in western PA, where we have a lot of decent hills), the sedan that does all of its braking in the last 20 feet before the stop sign, or the SUV that slips and slides its way up to 55mph in a 30mph zone, I cringe to see them on the road. I’d rather drive late at night in bad weather than mid-day in bad weather, because there are fewer other cars at night.
I’ve gotta say, there’s a big difference between western PA, and Washington DC, though. January 2011, 1-foot-3-hours storm hit DC. It took me 6 hours to get home, but (a) an hour of that was dinner, 3 hours and 3 miles from the office, and (b) I did LOTS better than the 11-hour crowd.
February 2011, I’m at my first Frostburn. No precipitation till Sunday night, then an inch or so of snow, followed by sleet and freezing rain. HOWEVER, Monday around noonish, a 1-foot / 3 hours storm hit the campground. By the time I had the car loaded (including just stuffing in a tent, plus 25 pounds of snow) I had to dig my tent poles out of about 6″ of accumulation. That said, by the time I was ready to leave, the back-road to the campground had been plowed. Twice.
I had lost power, for a week, 3 times because of ice storms. One early fall there was a generator sale and I bought one. After the next ice storm, my power stayed on and the neighbors across the street lost theirs for a change. Having a new generator in a box in the garage kept my power on for the next 6 years. It started, first pull, when I needed it.
I like being self sufficient. I know people that move into hotels when they lose their internet. The next spring, several garage sales had used generators. Power failures are like flat tires; you don’t sell your tools after you’ve had one.
Maryland learned a lesson over the last few years, and this past spring/summer in my town the local power company paid a tree service to go around and cut branches down willy-nilly if they hung over power lines. No consideration given to the aesthetics or health of the tree. There are some ugly trees around here – but the power’s not likely to go out for a while because of broken tree limbs!
Apparently guys at CTYM not survivalist-minded; they would’ve been ready for General Winter. Rumor had it on gunship in the area was survivalist-minded, and had MRE cases & water in back marked not for sale.
Preps must include more than vodka (says the guy with 2/5ths of rum in his car supply cache).
congratulations!
Few things are more fun than talking in heavy fake Russian accents.
😀
You’ve been watching FPS Russia again, haven’t you?
*trying to think of a way to work the phrase “nuclear wessels” in*
I has an amuse.
Of all the dozen or so web comics I read on a regular basis, the only one that Google Now (on my phone) tells me about is F2F.
Seriously loved the book. Even more than Lethe.
And THANK YOU FOR PUTTING IT OUT IN KINDLE FORMAT! I was laid up in the hospital and had no net access or reading material, but my kindle has 3G … man, you saved me from going stir-crazy in there.
For those of you who haven’t read it: don’t read the reviews, just buy the damn thing. The more you mull it over, the more you rob yourself of a great piece of suspense.
(ps – you are working on the next one, yet? How about now? Now? Or, now? Ok, tomorrow? It comes out this week, right? RIGHT!?!?!?!)
Glad to hear! Do me a fave? Review it on Amazon. And tell everyone to buy it. EVERYONE.